Okay so earlier this year, spur of the moment, at the recommendation and encouragement of several people, I applied to go to Photography School. I was interviewed, they looked at my portfolio and then I was accepted on condition that (a) I get student loans and (b) I can get a disability loan to pay for interpreter due to my hearing loss.
Well, first, I was told I would get an official letter of acceptance in the mail by June 1st. So I waited, June 1st came and went and I finally emailed them and said that I hadn't gotten the letter yet. Then they finally emailed me back and said I don't need it. By this time it is July and so I am trying to apply for student loans (by the way, our student loans are via provincial government) but the online application isn't working for some reason. It keeps telling me that I do not exist. So frustrating. I phoned a few times and left messages the first 2 times, but the last time I didn't even get a machine. No one called me back. Finally a couple weeks ago my brother phoned for me on the hearing side and got ahold of someone but they told him to have me fax them and give them permission to "change my user id" so I faxed them and I never heard back from them. I tried again thinking well maybe they will just fix it and not email me back. So i tried again 2 times. nothing.
So I get a paper copy of the application, it takes longer for paper copies to be processed, but I emailed the photo school to tell them that I am sending a paper copy to student loans, sorry for the delay.
And they (school) email me back 3 days later and said that it's taking too long, and that maybe I should consider coming another year.
Well, you know, I'm so disappointed. I wasn't really sure I wanted to go but I just lost my husband recently and my daughter not that long ago, I'm not really sure I want to do ANYTHING right now but I know I wanted to do this more than I want to go back to work, and I thought that maybe, just maybe, this was meant to be, because I didn't set out for this, it came to me. (the website was sent to me by a friend)
So anyway I have not emailed the school back, I don't know what to say. I don't think I will go next year or any other year. It feels to me as if this was my only chance. My last ditch effort to make my life even a little bit worthwhile.
I have spent the last couple days kind of in a fog since getting that email, because, once again, my life is up in the air and I don't know what to do or where to go now.
- I am a bereaved mother and wife. I began this blog to help me look for the "good things" in life after my daughter, "Babybear", died in July 2005. Three years later, her daddy, my husband, "Bear", died in November 2008. (You'll find a link to their stories on my blog) And now, as difficult as it is, I continue to look for the good things in my life as I learn my new normal with my pup, "Furrybear", at my side. And the angels on my shoulder...